Um...I Have an Eye Patch

Or should I say AARRRGH?!!!

So here is a lesson and a warning and aren't you glad you have me here to give you such snippets of wisdom to live by? I was taking off my makeup last night, using a cotton ball with a little Mary Kay remover to get the tough stuff off...because you know how mascara can be. I think my eye must have been just slightly open when I swiped the cotton ball across the lid because it felt like something was in my eye, and it was stinging, I tell you. STINGING! It watered and such, but I looked and looked and looked some more, with no luck. There was just nothing to be found. I thought to myself, "Welp...whatever it is, it will find it's way out in just a little while."

But every time I blinked my eye, it hurt. So then I thought maybe it wouldn't come out, but it was bedtime so whatever, right? I'll just close my eyes and in the morning it will be fine.

But no. It was not fine, and I hardly slept a wink. I tried, I did, but the most I got were some really strange dreams. And then I would wake up because my eye was bothering me. On the cycle went, all through the night. So when I came downstairs this morning, my mom took a good look and couldn't see a thing, and that led to a good flushing of the eye, some eye goo medicine (look, I don't know what the stuff is, but we put it on my eye anyway), and then came the patch.

I am wearing a patch.

I look ridiculous and now everyone is making pirate jokes, of course, because what else are you going to do when someone has a patch over her eye? You are going to make the joke.

But the thing is, it is ever so annoying to have one of your lovely eyes out of commission, and yes, I stayed home from church. I am vain...vain enough that I am NOT going out in public with a patch on my face.

So next time you are taking your makeup off, tread lightly my friends. Tread lightly.