Always Running...

I started running many moons ago. In college. I remember well my freshman year refusing to get anything but an A in P.E. So I had to run because in order to get an A you had to run a mile and a half in under twelve and a half minutes. Now here, I thought to myself, was a sure thing. Here I had much more than just a modicum of control over the outcome. I was going to get that A. And I did. Barely. With like seconds to spare. But I did.

Freshman year was also when I first experienced a second wind and a runner's high. I didn't know what a second wind was. Seriously. I'd heard the term, but I had no idea what that meant. And then I was running, and usually after about the second mile, maybe the third, I was tired and ready to be done. Well, I remember this one day when it was sort of cold out. I thought I'd give myself a full thirty minutes. And then when I reached about twenty-five or so, something weird happened. I could just keep going. I thought to myself, "Well that's strange, but it can't last too long." But it did. I didn't feel tired at all. I felt full of energy, like I could just go and go. I ran much more than thirty minutes that day. And that was the day that running and I were on. We weren't dating casually anymore. We had a thing.

And since then, running and me have had this on again/off again romance. I mean, when I'm into running, and running is into me, we do well together. But when we are off, and running betrays me, well, that means we'll be on a break for anywhere from a week to months and months. And maybe even a full year (okay so that was more me and my new boyfriend law school, and no so much running). Of course, in the end, law school and I were so over each other. So I hooked back up with running, and that's when things got good.

But here is the strange thing. I've been a treadmill runner for a long time. And me, the treadmill and running really get along. My time is much better when I'm on a treadmill and I feel like I could go forever. Seriously. Then, when I decide on fresh air and such, my running is not so great. Not so fast, no so energized. And I find myself wanting to quit mid-way through my runs.

How can I run for eight or nine miles on a treadmill and then get outside and want to quit after three or four? And why is it that when I do a short run, say four miles, on the treadmill, I can do it in about thirty-five or thirty-six minutes. Not too shabby for yours truly (I didn't say I was super speedy. Hey, I'm working on it!). But when I'm outside four miles can take from forty to forty-six, even forty-seven minutes. Today it was forty-two and I was super excited because that's my best time in the great out-of-doors in a loooooooooong time! Peeps...I do not understand it.

Everyone says the difference is something I've created in my head. I'm not sure. I'm running more outside than inside because I happen to heart the great out-of-doors with its fresh air and greenery and whatnot. I'm so not breaking up with running, but I swear, if we don't start getting along on these outside runs, there is going to be some serious drama in this relationship!